Farnsworth Sisters

The Leaving Begins

Why is the leaving so painful?  From the first child going to kindergarten to the last child going to college- I don’t think it gets any easier.  Is it so painful because they will be gone, or because I instantly and clearly can see all of the things I did wrong or missed teaching and loving during my time with my child?

Even when you are pregnant and you have a baby leave you during labor, it is painful.  But it all  gets better after the leaving is over– you get to start a whole new experience filled with challenges and love.  And it is always worth every moment of the pain.

When Dad left us, I kept thinking of the familiar story that he told of when Mom and Dad took Beth to BYU for the first time.  After getting her all settled in her dorm, they drove away.  A few blocks down the road, they pulled over and cried.  They knew this was the beginning of their close family group leaving. That is one of the feelings I had when Dad died.  And I wondered how I could say goodbye to someone I loved that much and I wouldn’t see for 60 or more years.  It was too long and too much pain.  So I never said goodbye.  A few weeks ago I was in the temple and I remembered that question- how do I say goodbye to someone for 60 years?  But for some reason that day in the temple, 60 years seemed like just a small moment and I knew I could make it.

So as the leaving begins from our home, I hope I can remember those few things.  It gets better on the other side of the leaving.  We have eternity to be together.  And it is worth every tear that falls just for the chance to be their mom.